Settle before the damage is irreparable for the sake of the children!!!! As a product of divorced parents, I can tell you that feuding parents leaves an everlasting impression on children no matter what age. Thinking about those consequences can truly save children from a great deal of emotional damage and relationship problems as they get older. When parents are ending their marriages they should take time to talk to their children properly. Respecting the other parent no matter how hurt they are or hard it is makes a world of difference. Trust me, your children will respect you in more ways than you could ever imagine. Divorce does NOT have to be a terrible event if done with diplomacy and respect for the entire family. Life coaches and therapists can assist with the tough questions that persist during a turbulent divorce. Regardless, your soon to be ex will be in your life for a very long time if you have children. Learn from others, like in the Brinkley matter even though they ultimately settled their differences (twice) their children have been negatively affected from the fallout from the press and court appearances. They are innocent victims. Remember that before you bash your spouse to or in front of your children.