When I asked Dr. Belisa Vranich for some help for people getting divorced this is what she told Me- LISTEN closely… No matter how you well you look like you are keeping it together on the outside, your insides are getting turned upside down. During and after a divorce, be kind to yourself, pamper yourself, and watch out for signs of stress. Three things to keep an eye out for are: 1. Watch what you are saying to yourself. If it is something like “this was the biggest mistake of my life,” or “I’m such an idiot, why didn’t I see this coming” you can end up making yourself feel worse. Try things like “at least this chapter of my life is done and I can turn the page,” or “hard lesson learned, but at least I won’t make that mistake again.” 2. Your emotions may run the gamut, even in a short amount of time — don’t worry, it’s normal. You are sad one moment and the next, feeling relieved and light. Then angry, then proud of yourself. Then you end with downright confused because of all these mixed up feelings. They’ll level out, don’t worry. 3. Displaced emotions? Rather than lash out or cry to him/her, you find yourself overwhelmed by sadness during a movie, or fuming with rage while driving. Knowing where it’s coming from — the divorce process– can help you make sense of it.